Coffee Quest by Cool Game Maker

Coffee Quest

Played 2,260 times
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Source Code

The maximum score is 64.

When play begins:
 say "Preface[paragraph break]I made this game when I was approximately 10 years old and just remembered my password to this account. I am currently working on relearning Inform 7 (which, by the way, have no idea how I learned at the age of 10) and updating it but for now the painfully unfunny and absurd gameplay remains. Enjoy<3[paragraph break]";
say "Welcome to coffee quest![paragraph break]To drink something, say 'consume (coffee)'.[paragraph break]That's all you need to know for now. Enjoy!"

Kissn is number variable.

Instead of entering the Adam's House while kissn is 1:
 say "Adam answers the door and then slams the door in your face,."

Instead of kissing Adam:
 say "You lean into Adam with your lips puckered up. Adam screams, slaps you in the face, and kicks you out of his house.";
 now the player is in Cardinal Avenue;
 increase kissn by 1.


The Cardinal Avenue is a room. "[if the Cardinal Avenue is unvisited] You haven't gotten any sleep for weeks. Your energy has almost completely depleted. All you can find in your refrigerator is a few French roast beans. Get coffee from anywhere possible to get your energy back up.[paragraph break] The intersection of Cardinal Avenue and Gary Road is to the east, Adam's House is to the south, and west Cardinal Avenue is to the west.[end if][if the Cardinal Avenue is visited] A street. The intersection of Cardinal Avenue and Gary Road is to the east, Adam's House is to the south, and west Cardinal Avenue is to the west.[end if]"

The Adam's House is south of the Cardinal Avenue. "[if the Adam's House is unvisited]You knock on the door tiredly.[paragraph break] Adam opens the door. Thank god.[paragraph break]'Hey William, how are you?' he says. 'You look tired, would you like some coffee? Come on in.'[paragraph break] Thank god again. You slowly trudge into the kitchen.[end if][if the Adam's House is visited]'Oh, William, I guess your here again......' Adam says, turning his head to the left and sighing. 'Come in.'[end if]"

Adam is a person in the Adam's House. The description is "Your good friend Adam. He feels your need for the coffee."

A coffee cup is a container in the Adam's House. The description is "What are you waiting for? Drink the coffee!". 

The cinnamon roast coffee is inside the coffee cup. The description is "Hecka delicious coffee."

Consuming is an action applying to one thing. Understand "consume [something]" as consuming.

Things have a number called coffee. The coffee of a thing is usually 0. The KFC Roast has coffee 1.

Check consuming:
 if the coffee of the noun is 0, say "That's not coffee." instead.

Carry out consuming:
 say "Uugh, decaf."

Instead of consuming cinnamon roast coffee:
 say "This cinnamon roast coffee is absolutely delicious. You might need a few more kilograms of caffeine, though.";
 award 1 point;
 now the cinnamon roast coffee is off-stage.

West Cardinal Avenue is west of Cardinal Avenue. "West Cardinal Avenue is a dead end. To the east is Cardinal Avenue, and to the west is Starclucks."

Chicken is a person in the West Cardinal Avenue. The printed name is "a chicken all hopped up on caffeine". The description is "'BAWK BAWK BAWK BAWK STARCLUCKS!' the chicken yells. Its probably FULL of coffee......enough coffee to get your energy up.....hmmm...." 

Instead of consuming Chicken:
 say "The raw meat and blood makes you sick to your stomach. A random farmer comes up and pitchforks you in the heart for eating his chicken.";
 end the game in death.

Starclucks is west of West Cardinal Avenue. "'Hey, would you like a free sample of our KFC Roast?' a chicken asks.[paragraph break]Sounds disgusting, but coffee's coffee."

A Starclucks Cup is a container in the Starclucks. The description is "Smells like fried chicken."

A KFC Roast is in the Starclucks Cup. The description is "Smells like fried chicken."

Intersection is east of the Cardinal Avenue. The printed name is "Intersection of Cardinal Avenue and Gary Road". "Aah, the grand intersection of Cardinal Avenue and Gary Road! Jacob's mansion is to the east and JP's house is to the northeast. The rest of the road is north and south. Coffee ahead!"

Jacob's Mansion is east of the Intersection. "Jacob opens the door wearing a tye-dye shirt.[paragraph break]'Hey, William!' he says. 'Whatcha need?'[paragraph break]'Well, I'm really tired, and I need coffee. Can you help me out?' you ask.[paragraph break]'Sorry, William, I don't have any coffee. But I have a new funky vegan decaf recipe, utilizing 276 life hacks tha-' You shut the door in his face before he can finish and stand at his front door."

Instead of going to Jacob's Mansion the second time:
 say "No way, I don't want hipster decaf."

Instead of going to Jacob's Mansion the third time:
 say "No way, I don't want hipster decaf."

Instead of going to Jacob's Mansion the fourth time:
 say "No way, I don't want hipster decaf."

Instead of going to Jacob's Mansion the fifth time:
 say "No way, I don't want hipster decaf."

JP's House is northeast of the Intersection. "'[if the JP's House is unvisited] HIAHIAHI WILLIAM I'M SO EXCITED WANT SOME COFFEE I HAVE TONS OF COFFEE!!!!!!!!'[paragraph break]Energy. I envy it so much. You walk inside and try to stand JP's excitement.[paragraph break]OMG. He has 80,000 cups of coffee, and I'm not even exaggerating. I counted.[paragraph break]'YOU CAN HAVE THIS LIGHT COFFEE OK I NEED THE REST TO DRINK' he yelps. Yay, coffee![end if][if the JP's House is visited] 'HI WILLIAM SORRY I CANT GIVE YOU ANYMORE COFFEE I NEED THE REST FOR MORE ENERGY BUT YOU CAN COME IN ANYWAY' JP yells.[end if]"

A JPCup is a container in the JP's House. The printed name is "JP's Coffee Cup Number 26482". The description is "It's cup #26482. That says enough.".
Understand "coffee cup" as a JPCup.
Understand "cup" as a JPCup.

A Light coffee is inside the JPCup.

Instead of consuming Light coffee:
 say "This is cruddy coffee(you can't expect quality from 1 of 80,000 cups of coffee), but it's still energizing.";
 award 1 point;
 now the Light coffee is off-stage.

Thug is a person in the Intersection. Thug is carrying the $5. The description is "A tough looking thug. His pockets are full of money. Maybe you could attack him and get the money."

Instead of attacking Thug:
 say "You slap the thug.[paragraph break]'Oww! Please don't hurt me, I'm just trying to live a peaceful life, here have five bucks, but LEAVE ME ALONE!!!' the thug yelps. He throws a five dollar bill at you and runs away.";
 now Thug is off-stage;
 now the player is carrying the $5.

The Gary Road North is north of the Intersection. "Northern Gary Avenue. Starbucks is to the west and a turn is to the east." 

A $3 is in the Gary Road North. The description is "Sweet, money on the street.".

Starbucks is west of the Gary Road North. "[if the Starbucks is unvisited] 'Hello, welcome to Starbucks! We only serve pumpkin spice lattes right now. A large pumpkin spice latte is $5 and a small is $3.' the woman at the counter says.[paragraph break]HALLELUJAH![end if][if the Starbucks is visited] Starbucks. A large pumpkin spice latte is $5 and a small is $3.[end if]"

Waitress is a person in the Starbucks. Waitress is carrying the small pumpkin spice latte and the large pumpkin spice latte. The description is "'Hi. A large pumpkin spice latte is $5 and a small one is $3.' the waitress says. If you want a latte, give the money to her.".

Instead of giving the $5 to Waitress:
 say "'Large pumpkin spice latte, coming right up!'";
 now the $5 is off-stage;
 now the player is carrying the large pumpkin spice latte.

Instead of giving the $3 to Waitress:
 say "'Small pumpkin spice latte, coming right up!'";
 now the $3 is off-stage;
 now the player is carrying the small pumpkin spice latte.

Instead of consuming the small pumpkin spice latte:
 say "Aah, so refreshing. Starbucks hits the spot.";
 now the small pumpkin spice latte is off-stage;
 award 2 points.

Instead of consuming the large pumpkin spice latte:
 say "This latte is delicious, but too large. You barf it up in a trash can.";
 now the large pumpkin spice latte is off-stage;
 award -2 points.

Pilot Road is east of Gary Road North. "[if the Pilot Road is unvisited]You turn east from North Gary Avenue and find a small dirt road leading to an office building to the east. Maybe they have coffee....[end if][if the Pilot Road is visited]This is pilot road. An office building lies to the east. Another street is north.[end if]".

Office Building is east of the Pilot Road. "[if the Office Building is unvisited]You enter a small room. Nothing exciting surrounds you
...except for A COFFEE MACHINE! But the pot is empty. Rats.[end if][if the Office Building is visited]This is a small room with an empty coffee machine inside.[end if]"

Business Man is a person in the Office Building. The description is "A man in a suit and tie. He's holding some coffee." The Business Man is carrying the cheap coffee.

Instead of stealing the cheap coffee:
 say "You take the coffee from the man. He looks at you in disbelief for a second, but he falls asleep before he can speak.";
 now the player is carrying the cheap coffee.

Instead of consuming the cheap coffee:
 say "This coffee is tasteless and poorly brewed, but at least it has caffeine";
 award 1 point;
 now the cheap coffee is off-stage.

South Gary Road is south of the Intersection. "[if South Gary Road is unvisited] South Gary Road is where people like to stand on the street and make you buy their junk. 'Hey,' a voice behind you says, 'Want some of my special extremely overprice-I mean delicious coffee? Only $20!' $20 for coffee? The only way you could afford that is by stealing the overpriced coffee![paragraph break]Further South Gary Road is to the south.[end if][if South Gary Road is visited] South Gary Road. A man here is selling coffee for $20. Further South Gary Road is to the south.[end if]"

Coffee Man is a person in the South Gary Road. The description is "'Well, do you want any $20 coffee?' he asks." The Coffee Man is carrying the overpriced coffee.

Stealing is an action applying to one thing. Understand "steal [something]" as stealing.

Things have a number called steal. The steal of a thing is usually 0. The $10 has steal 1.

Check stealing:
 if the steal of the noun is 0, say "You can't steal that." instead.

Carry out stealing:
 say "You attempt to steal the [printed name], but the SWAT team comes at shoots you in the head.";
 end the game in death.

Instead of stealing the overpriced coffee:
 say "You quickly swipe the coffee and run away while the coffee man isn't looking. YESSSSS.";
 now the player is carrying the overpriced coffee.

Instead of consuming the overpriced coffee:
 say "You sip the overpriced coffee. This is disgusting! The coffee tastes like mud. The coffee still has a decent amount of caffiene, though. Still, good thing you didn't pay for it.";
now the overpriced coffee is off-stage;
increase the score by one.

Further South Gary Road is south of the South Gary Road."This is Further South Gary Road. East is Beau's house and south is Cafe Amour. Another street is west." A Rich Woman is here. The description is "A French rich woman. You can see a $10 bill peeking out of her pocket.". The Rich Woman is carrying the $10.

Cafe Amour is south of Further South Gary Road. The description is "[if the Cafe Amour is unvisited] The woman at the counter greets you.[paragraph break]'Bonjour! Bienvenue Cafe Love! La meilleure cuisine franÃ§aise-' [paragraph break]You get impatient and interrupt. 'Alright, let's cut to the chase. How much is coffee?' you ask. 'Oh, $5,' she replies.[end if][if the Cafe Amour is visited] Cafe Amour, a delicious French restaurant. Coffee is $5.[end if]"

Instead of giving the $5 to Counter Lady:
 say "The lady thanks you and gives you the French coffee.";
 now the player is carrying the French coffee;
 now the Counter Lady is carrying the $5.

Counter Lady is a person in the Cafe Amour. The description is "A French woman. If you want a French coffee, give her the money." The Counter Lady is carrying the French coffee.

Instead of consuming the French coffee:
 say "Divine French coffee with just the right amount of cream. Better than all the other coffees you had today.";
 now the French coffee is off-stage;
 award 2 points.

Beau's House is east of the Further South Gary Road. "[if the Beau's House is unvisited]You knock on Beau's door. Surely he has some good coffee.[paragraph break]Beau opens the door quickly and says 'Jacob already warned me. Get out.'[paragraph break]Beau closes the door in your face. Dangit![end if][if the Beau's House is visited]You walk up to the door, but Beau sees you through his window, locks his doors, and turns off the lights to pretend he isn't home.[end if]".

The Phoenix is west of the Further South Gary Road. The printed name is "Phoenix Blvd.". "[if the Phoenix is unvisited]You turn into Phoenix Boulevard, the longest street in the city. There are 20 coffee shops on this road![paragraph break]Loud flapping sounds are further east. What the heck is making that noise?[paragraph break]You turn around.[paragraph break]It's MOTHRA? But this isn't normal Mothra. This is Mothra all hopped up on caffeine.[paragraph break]You must kill it for the coffee.[end if][if the Phoenix is visited]It's Mothra Boulevard.[end if]"

A laser gun is here. The description is "SWEET! LASER GUN!"

Mothra is a person in the Phoenix. The description is "What are you doing? Run from Mothra!"

Shooting is an action applying to two things. Understand "shoot [someone] with [something preferably held]" as shooting.

People have a number called gun.

After taking the laser gun:
 say "You take the laser gun.";
 now the gun of the player is 1.

Check shooting:
 if the gun of the player is 0, say "You can't shoot without a gun."

Carry out shooting:
 say "Why would you want to shoot [printed name]?"

Instead of shooting Mothra:
 say "You fire the laser gun at Mothra. The laser hits Mothra, and Mothra explodes in fireworks. Coffee falls from the sky! HOORAH! You have gotten all the coffee you need in life![paragraph break]Your stats:[line break]Total score: [score][line break]Coffees drank: [list of off-stage things][line break]Play again to try to improve your scores.[line break]Goodbye!";
 end the game in victory.