A Horrific Adventure in Comedy by Particle Wart

A Horrific Adventure in Comedy

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"A Horriffic Adventure In Comedy".

The story headline is "Where Comedy Meets Horror".

Stinky Room is a room."Smelly. You haven't cleaned your bedroom for years, and that's why it smells so bad.".
The Land Of Meeples is a room. "You Stand in the midst of a vast grassy plain. An 11 foot tall Green Meeple accidentally stomps you flat. The last thing you hear is the Green Meeple saying 'Poor little thing, I didn't mean to squish it…'".


John is a person. 
John is in the land of cars.
John is scenery.
The Land Of Cars is a room. "You find yourself in a huge parking lot, it reaches as far as you can see. Extremely loud 'car' noises are emanating from a huge toddler who looks remarkably like your baby brother, John.".

Baige Man is a closed openable transparent vehicle."Baige Man, your brother's favorite car is here. He is [if baige man is open]open[else]closed[end if].".
Baige Man is in the land of cars.
Baige Man is closed.
[Rule for printing the room description details for a vehicle: do nothing.]
The description is "You see a super cool old VW truck. You walk up to it and it introduces itself. 'Hi! I'm Baige Man, a super cool old VW truck. I have short term memory loss, so I might introduce myself multiple times to you! I see you're a newcomer, let's explore.' He points west, and you wonder how he can point, since he has no fingers.".

The Puma Room is west of the Land of cars. "[if the player is not in baige man]Suddenly, a car shaped like a golden puma starts ramming Baige Man. As he is rammed over and over, he groans 'get in and help…  Oh... not again!'[else]A golden puma-shaped car rams Baige Man, but you ram him back and throw him into a handy pit of mud.[end if]".

pumavisit is a number that varies.
pumavisit is 0.

Every turn while in the puma room: if the player is not in baige man, now pumavisit is 1.

Report going somewhere from the land of cars: if the player is in a room, say "Baige Man follows you."; if the player is in a room (called the rumm), move Baige Man to the rumm.

After going somewhere from the puma room: end the game saying "You Have Deserted Baige Man".

Every turn while in Baige Man: if baige man is in the puma room begin; if pumavisit is 1, say "You beat up a lot of cars while in Baige Man, and throw the golden puma car into a handy pit of mud."; end the game saying "You bring Baige Man back to your house and ride him every day. You Have Won!"; end if.


The Land Of The Decapitated Stickmen is a room. "You find yourself in a long, dark alley. The sky is a dull reddish-orange, and the dark skyscrapers on either side of you seem to be cutting the sky. The alley continues to the south. A tall, dark shape moves in the darkness of an office beside you to the west…".
The Edge Of A Cliff is south of the land of the decapitated stickmen. "You find yourself at the edge of a cliff. A dog poop smugly surveys you before hopping off. The sun is setting behind a wrack of clouds on a reddish-orange sky. You start as footsteps approach from behind. Something pushes you off, and the last thing you see is a decapitated stickman holding a paper knife and it's still smirking pet dog poop."
Every turn while in the edge of a cliff: end the game in death.
The Tall Dark Shape is a person. 
The description is "A Tall Dark Shape holding a paper knife stands before you.".
Instead of asking the tall dark shape about something for the first time: say "The Tall Dark figure jerks, as if surprised to hear your voice.".
Sanity is a number that varies.
Sanity is 4.
Every turn while in the Dark Office: if sanity is less than 0 begin; say "The sun sets, and with that THING standing in front of you, you feel your sanity begin to dwindle. Screaming and gibbering, you run out of the office, into the alleyway, and plunge off the cliff to the south, slipping in the still smirking dog poop as you go."; end the game in death; end if.
The Tall Dark Shape carries a paper knife.
The Tall Dark Shape is in The Dark Office.
The dog poop is an animal in the office. It is scenery.
The description is "A dog poop smirks up at you from the floor.".
Every turn while in the office: now Sanity is Sanity - 1.
The Dark Office is west of the land of the decapitated stickmen. "An office, long since abandoned by anything civilized. A dog poop sits on the floor, smirking at you.".
The red button is in the stinky room.
It is scenery.
The blue button is in the stinky room.
It is scenery.
The green button is in the stinky room."Some buttons are on the wall: one is green, with a short humaniod icon on it, one is blue with a car on it, and the last is red, with a decapitated stickman on it. Which one will you push…".
It is fixed in place.

Instead of pushing the blue button: move the player to the land of cars.

Instead of pushing the red button: move player to The Land Of The Decapitated Stickmen.


Instead of taking the green button: say "No no, little boi.".
Instead of pushing the green button: say "You push the green button. The world fades…"; move player to The Land Of Meeples; End the game saying "Luckily, you were smashed into the ground, so there was no need for a burial, which might cost a lot of money!".

The Red Chair is an enterable supporter in The Stinky Room.
It is edible.
It is not fixed in place.
Instead of eating The Red Chair: end the game saying "You evil owner! Why would you try to eat your favorite pet!?".
The description is "I'm feeling like a chair. It's a shame.".
Use no scoring.