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To Avenge The Stars
by
Stephen Johnson
Played 2,306 times
View game source
(spoilers!)
Download the
.z8 file
Source Code
"To Avenge The Stars" The living room is a room. "It's dark at the farmhouse. Too dark... You suspect it's the work of communists. You just shot and killed your whole family... That is, except for your three year old son. Somehow you knew it would come to this. You, a maniac who flipped out when he lost his job at the Oyster Factory, hunting down your son, a kid who'd do anything to survive... The living room is dimly lit. You can see papers all over the floor; furniture toppled. You must find that child... Or else. The dining room is to the north and the hallway is to the east." A chair is in the living room. On it is a gold key. A book is in the living room. The description of the book is "The title: How to kill your family in ten easy steps. Chapter 1: Acquire a Means of Murder. So, you want to kill your family. Well, you've come to the right place! First, it's all about choosing a weapon. How do you... I don't have time for this right now." A dead body is in the living room. The description of the dead body is "My ex-wife's dead body. You punch her dead face. She was probably a secret communist." The dead body is fixed in place. A masturbating alien is in the living room. The masturbating alien is fixed in place. The description of the key is "This key will help me kill my son." The description of the masturbating alien is "Do you have to do that here, Larry." The description of the chair is "It's a fucking chair. Get over it." The chair is fixed in place. The dining room is north of the living room. "This dining room, where you ate so many intolerable meals with your family (who is now mostly dead), is now quiet. Too quiet... You remember all the good times you had together... There weren't any. The living room is to the south and the kitchen is to the east." A table is in the dining room. On it is a knife. The table is fixed in place. A severed finger is in the dining room. The severed finger is edible. The description of the finger is "Mmmm, this severed finger looks edible... And delicious. Perhaps I will absorb the powers of the departed." The description of the table is "It's a gay table alright." A radio is in the dining room. The radio is fixed in place. The description of the radio is "go to http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ss0kFNUP4P4 to listen to the radio while you inspect the house." The description of the knife is "This might be perfect for stabbing my son's head. Or slicing up a grapefruit for later. Either one really." The hallway is east of the living room. "This hallway has blood smeared along the walls and pictures of smiling people. They're not smiling anymore. Now that they're dead. Written in blood on the wall, a message: youll never kill me dad. We'll see about that, wont we. There's a set of stairs that take you upstairs. The living room is to the west, the kitchen is to the north, there's a small bathroom to the east. My son is probably upstairs, but I should finish inspecting the first floor first." A dildo is in the hallway. The description of the dildo is "Oh, that's where I put that." The bathroom is east of the hallway. "The mirror of the bathroom is broken. There is a racoon sitting cross legged in the corner. The toilet lid is closed, but you can open it. The hallway is west of the bathroom." A toilet is in the bathroom. The toilet is a closed openable container. In the toilet is a shit. The toilet is fixed in place. The description of the toilet is "I took many good shits in that toilet. And many times I hid from my family and my past. I never told anyone, but my father never loved me. It was difficult. I went to Vietnam because I thought he'd be proud, but when I came back he only berated me and complained about how Eisenhower was destroying this nation. It hurt to be shot in the ass in Hanoi, but not as much as my father ignoring me. He loved my brother who was a librarian. I wept many times here. No more. I can probably open this toilet lid." The description of the shit is "It's a solid log, at least six inches. Good thickness, too. It looks edible." The shit is edible. After taking the shit, say "God, this feels so gross." Before eating the shit: say "That tasted terrible. Bad idea. I need a tums." The description of the racoon is "He looks legit serious. Maybe I should ask him about his meditations." The racoon is a person in the bathroom. After asking the racoon about "meditations": say "'You ask me about my meditations? Let me tell you: the world is full of sadness. Only by connecting with the Vada Bada Bing Bong in the sky can one achieve real peace. Also, LSD. That will do it, too. Killing your family is not the answer. It will never make your father look up to you...' Stupid squirrel, you think. It doesn't know what it's talking about." The kitchen is east of the dining room and north of the hallway. "This kitchen is where you first got the idea to kill your family. But it's also the room where you grew up and stole cookies. You were sure that your mom knew, but she let you get away with it, too. Even if it was just before supper. You wipe a tear from your eye. The past is gone! The blood on the cupboards is evidence of that. The hallway is south of the kitchen and the dining room is to the west." A grapefruit is in the kitchen. The description of the grapefruit is "I love this stuff. More than sex and patricide combined." The grapefruit is edible. Before eating the grapefruit: say "As I said already, I love this stuff. I mean, I don't even feel like killing my family in a remorseless rage anymore. This is heaven! On second thought... Let's finish the job." A cupboard is in the kitchen. The description of the cupboard is "I hate this cupboard. It reminds me of my father." The cupboard is fixed in place. A drawer is in the kitchen. In it is a LSD. The description of the drawer is "This drawer was made with my bare hands from Swiss wood I smuggled across the border." The drawer is a closed openable container. The drawer is fixed in place. The LSD is edible. The description of the LSD is "I haven't taken LSD since I got back from Vietnam and drowned my sorrows in hallucinagens. My waking life was a nightmare and I needed an outlet. Who will judge me? You? Yeshua? I don't believe in fairy tales. I believe in punishing the wicked. I am the angel of death." Before eating the LSD: say "Bottoms up. I'm ready to become one with the universe! This is my communion with God." The cupboard is a closed openable container. In it is a top hat. The top hat is wearable. The description of the top hat is "I love this hat. It really puts me in the mood to kill everyone. Then make love to that masturbating alien." Before wearing the top hat: say "What was I thinking? I should have been wearing this the whole time! Idiot." The front door is a closed locked door. The silver key unlocks the front door. The front yard is a room. "You are free! You've decided not to kill your son. The moon is in full show. You see a gloomy figure ahead of you... It looks like a ghost." The front door is south of the hallway. The front yard is south of the front door. The ghost is a person in the front yard. The description of the ghost is "It's the ghost of your father! He's dressed like Adolf Hitler. Oh my god... He's a crime against nature. Perhaps you should ask him about the past." After asking the ghost about "the past", say "The past? Ahh, what you mortals call the past! When you were a child, you were no good. A miserable person. And when you came back from Vietnam... Well, I hated you all the more because, frankly, you're not my son. I raised you as my own, but you're the son of a dentist named Levi Metzger. That's right! You're Jewish! Hahaha! What you always feared, huh? You're a no good person, just like your son. Now go kill him! (this makes you upset because your father is still controlling you from the grave and you feel like tell ghost about shutting up)." After telling ghost about "shutting up", say "You idiot! Don't be a queer Jew and go kill your son already! Sheesh." The Hallway2 is a room. "Alright, now you've learned your lesson. Time to kill your son and get even with your father! Where is my boy? Upstairs no doubt." The Hallway2 is north of the front yard. The corridor is a room. "Now, where is my son? There are two rooms here. My bedroom to the west and his playroom to the east. Hmmm... Where to go." The corridor is above the hallway. Every turn while in the corridor: If the player is not wearing the hat, now the player is in the hallway; say "I can't kill my son without my top hat." The bedroom is west of the corridor. "This is the room my wife and I made love... From our love making, our children were born.. So was I, when my parents had this room. But now the world is different... And I hate it! I'm a warrior now. My son doesn't appear to be here." A silver key is in the bedroom. The description of the silver key is "This key will take me outside! Perhaps to my freedom. It's not too late not to kill my son! Or is it... No, it's not. Obviously, but things are in motion yada yada yada." A poster is in the bedroom. The poster is fixed in place. The description of the poster is "Ye Olde Oyster Factory. That's where I once worked. For the man: Reggie. I really should kill Reggie, too." The playroom is east of the corridor. "Here he is! My son: Niles! How strange... He doesn't appear to be afraid. He appears to want to say something. Perhaps I should ask Niles (the three-year-old) about his fearlessness." Niles is a person in the playroom. After asking Niles about "his fearlessness", say "Dad, I'm not afraid of you. I know you don't want to kill me. What you really want is to kill your father. Or... To ask for his love. That's what you really want, right?" After answering Niles that "no", say "Don't lie, father! I'm going to give you one last chance to leave. Find the silver key and you can exit the front door, drive away and leave this all behind. I'll be fine. Goodbye father." After answering Niles that "yes", say "I know, father. I'm going to give you one last chance to leave. Find the silver key and you can exit the front door, drive away and leave this all behind. I'll be fine. Goodbye father." Corridor2 is above the hallway2. "Just to the east, the playroom where my son Niles waits to be murdered! Time to die. And make my father love me." Playroom2 is east of the corridor2. "My son is gone. The window has been smashed open and rain is coming in. There is a gold box. in the middle of the room though." A gold box is in the playroom2. In it is the diary. The gold box is a locked container. The matching key of the gold box is the gold key. A note is in the playroom2. The description of the note is "Dad, I'm sorry. You'll find what you need in the box. Get that first! Then, in the closet to the north. I have a gift for you." The description of the gold box is "This must be unlocked with that gold key I found... What did my son want me to find? Hmmm." The description of the diary is "Dear diary, I spent the day with my son, Hal, and my grandson Niles today. We went to the beach. It was beautiful and I loved every minute of it. I've never been able to tell it to my son, and I know I've been hard on him, but I love him so much. I hope that I dont die before I can tell him how I feel... Oh well. C'est la vie. The diary was marked the day before he had a heart attack. Now that you've learned your father did love you. You are overcome with remorse. You hate yourself and realize you killed your wife for no reason. You are afraid." The closet is north of the playroom2. After going to the closet: say "In the closet, your son is hanging from a noose. I don't know where a toddler learned how to make a noose, but there he is. Like a dumb communist. Just when you learned that your father truly loved you! You realize you have disappointed everyone and are overcome with grief."; end the game in death.